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09/23/2002 Entry: "Shudder, Fidget, Flicker, Flutter, Quiver, Nod."

A spasm of pain went down my arm. Shudder. "The vein moved," she said by means of explanation. "Are you doing alright?" I took a deep breath and said I was OK, but glad to be lying down.

As the instructor went over the course syllabus, it became clear that the topics I wanted to cover would all come tomorrow, and today would be largely review of familiar concepts. Fidget. At least he's a likeable character. And at least I'm not in the office.

The line for lunch was long enough to compose most of the email. "You must have pretty nimble thumbs," a co-worker offered about the Blackberry. You get used to it, I offer. The chef tosses the salad incredibly quickly, sends it towards the register. I pay and carry it back to our table. I send the email and I see it can't quite make a connection. Flicker. Damn. I scurry up to the front of the store by the window; it connects. I rejoin the table. While I sit and eat my salad I can't focus on conversation or food without wondering if the reply has come yet, but I pointedly ignore the urge to get up to check. But I still want to. Flutter.

I forget that Peet's Coffee is stronger than the coffee I'm used to. The odd feeling of too much caffeine settles into my hands, my feet, my jaw. Quiver. Even after a brisk walk home and a starchy snack I still have the same unsettled anxiety.

Now I'm done with my nightly blogroll and not sure quite what to do with myself. I'm still too strung out, but beginning to feel my head bob from getting up so early this morning. Nod. But lying down and closing my eyes (I've tried) does nothing to stop the brain from its shudder, fidget, flutter, flicker and quiver.

Tomorrow afternoon, I'll try tea.

Replies: One Comment

First the health-food thing and now... tea?!?

Who are you and what have you done with my roommate?

Posted by David @ 09/24/2002 01:48 AM PST

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