Getting Institutionalized.

The conservative course is not to banish gay people from making such commitments. It is to expect that they make such commitments. We shouldn’t just allow gay marriage. We should insist on gay marriage. We should regard it as scandalous that two people could claim to love each other and not want to sanctify their love with marriage and fidelity. –David Brooks, New York Times

While a group met in San Diego for a prayer meeting for ‘traditional’ marriage on Sunday, we like other people across the state went to a last-minute wedding with a different kind of prayer. I’m not one to say Amen, but it’s hard to disagree with a Presbyterian minister when she says that the love celebrated in a wedding is not a political act, but a divine one. She prayed that not only would Bill and Branden be united as husbands to God and community, but also would remain so in the eyes of the state and become so for the whole country. It was likewise hard not to burst into applause after everyone had signed the license and she noted softly, “It’s legal.” Amen, sister.

It’s a little bittersweet…the rush by the couples trying to get this done before the uncertainty of Tuesday’s election; the possibility that complete strangers can look at Bill and Branden, or our neighbors and friends, or even at me and The Boyfriend, and say to our faces, “You don’t have the same rights we do. We don’t think you deserve this.” We as gay people must be crazy to want this. That’s why they call it an institution, I suppose. For now we sit on pins, waiting to hear if the majority really will uphold the rights of the minority.

Bill and Branden, a million wishes for your happiness, whatever the voters decide. Forgive the gallows humor, but let’s hope the marriage lasts longer than Wednesday.

2 Responses to “Getting Institutionalized.”

  1. Jeremy Says:

    So, according to a friend of mine who understands constitutional law much more than I do, even if Prop Hate passes, those marriages cannot be dissolved. They are grandfathered in, and they will remain married, legally, unless they choose to divorce.

  2. Casey Says:

    Well…probably. Lambda Legal (as of September) isn’t sure what’s going to happen.
    “Because your marriage will have been valid at the time it was entered, we believe you will still be married after November 4, 2008 regardless of whether the initiative passes. Initiatives usually are not retroactive and this initiative does not say that it would be. If the initiative passes, there will likely be people or organizations who will try to argue that your marriage is no longer valid and that you were divorced against your will as of November 4. It is hard to predict with certainty what courts would decide because this situation is unprecedented.”